Yesterday I had quite a chat with one of my acquaintances She was pretty much drunk, I was high, so we started talking about stuff we don't usually discuss.
I was mostly listening an thinking, though, and I realized, well, it was like I could see life from her eyes for a while. It is vastly different. This was my first experience of altered mind state in a sense that my actual outlook on life shifted. I could totally understand her, accept her values, her perspective, without any reservations or judgement. Through this, my understanding of my life, my actions and the way other people perceive me shifted (hopefully permanently).
I realize now that _I_ am a weird one and though I might seem relatively normal, the inner workings of mind would probably surprise most people. Often, I end up doing expected things - but for entirely different reasons. This mostly goes for social relationship, but must be true for other things too.
Example: when I see a person who likes me I never expect there could be ANYTHING between us. Well, maybe, if we start dating and talking and really know each other, blah blah... For some people becoming friends and even having sex with others is - easy. Natural. Not much more difficult then having really deep conversation.
Maybe most extroverts are like this. If that is so, then most people would be actually correct when they say that we (introverts) are a weird bunch.
Because... Seriously: I remember that one day when I was 15 and a friend of mine invited me to her birthday party. I was honestly looking for a way to entertain myself - have some meaningful conversation, read some book from her library, tell some jokes. What most others were looking for was to get drunk (I'm not from USA so yes, teenagers were getting drunk, it was expected), and to have sex.
I couldn't imagine back then that you can just come to a party, get high, MEET someone new and have sex with her/him whatever, just like that. Maybe in movies, and exaggerated tales?
It was - not something I even wanted to try, because I never realized I could! It was like, completely out of question. I wouldn't know how to start this, I wouldn't know how to act. Even now when I see a girl who smiles to me at the party I'm like "well, she doesn't know me, so she must be smiling out of niceness, not because she just might be willing to know me better." And I bet this is the case OFTEN, but not all the time. So...I now realize why some people seemed disappointed with what seemed very nice time together, huh.
The way one sees things, people, relationships - it basically defines who we are, yet we suppose that most people see the world just like we do. But, there's often a difference. In fact, it is so huge a difference in some cases that it is a wonder how we, people, can function as united society.
I do feel enlightened, truly. It is very important to peek out of your shell once in a while.
